Author: Noir
Photo: Erik Eastman

Leaving.

Leaving behind many unfulfilled and treasured connections. But the uncertainties up ahead are more numerous.

They are sometimes left blank, speechless, but Aamosi said, “Look on the bright side, how many people gets a second chance at life?”

Aamosi described that Hong Kong experienced a smoke-less war. This wave of immigration was to run away from such a war waged on the city.

Coming to Canada, Jisitip gave up a choice career, one with room to spread her wings. Aamosi also gave up a position he held for 20 year, knowing that he will have to face a difficult start in Canada. Conflicted like many others, they hesitated to leave sooner. “We are starting from scratch”, Aamosi expressed, “but arriving earlier will give you a head start to build something new”.

Daily life in a new city has a completely new rhythm. When they had just arrived, Aamosi walked two hours to the post office to pick up a package because he had not figured out how public transit works. “My feet show me the neighbourhood”, he explained, “putting my foot on the ground makes me feel grounded”.

‘Doh Boh’, your step arrives. ‘Lok Gerk’, settling your feet. There is a process from ‘Doh Boh’ to Lok Gerk’. The transition for one to truly feel grounded can be a long journey. Everyone needs to find their own pace to be present in the

moment, to build a new life.

Aamosi appreciates the local culture where blue collars are not looked-down upon in public transit or commercial areas. “Different professions are appreciated for their service to the society. An accountant also needs a repairperson. There is no hierarchy”, adding, “if you are willing to work, you won’t go hungry”.

Because of his English skills, Aamosi lives mostly in Chinese circles. He describes the Chinese community here to be a mix of Hong Kongers and Mainlanders, having its own tension and subculture. Salaries are generally lower, and he has already heard about bosses who treat employees unfairly and poorly to the point of being oppressive.

Even though Aamosi’s coworkers are willing to share experience and guide his work, conversations rarely go deeper. He has to be careful not to aggravate others because he is uncertain of their political view of Hong Kong and China.

Aamosi also recognizes the importance of connections, job experience and credit ratings for apartment rentals, job search and even family doctor registration. This system can be difficult for newcomers to manage and overcome.

It is not that newcomers from Hong Kong do not want to connect with people, Aamosi and Jisitip observes, but they often hesitate because of a lack of trust; perhaps of being cautious in a strange city, or the trauma they brought over from the city they fled.

The couple is optimistic despite of the obstacles, and has also met many good people and good deeds. Having friends drive them around occasionally eases their physical and psychological strain as they slowly ‘Lok Gerk’. Sometimes it is the parent of Naangomai’s classmate driving her home from school, and sometimes it is their friends driving them to stock up at Costco.

“You have to be opened to accept others’ help”, Jisitip expressed.  And very soon, the family began to help newer newcomers who have just ‘Doh Boh’, opening their home for young people they have met at church and an organization back in Hong Kong.

Jisitip said, “If we know them, and they are in Toronto, it is natural to meet up and share a meal. Everyone’s situation is unique, facing different decisions”.

What is important is not who is helping who, but how people are knitted together thread by thread in the exchange.

Young Naangomai seems to be adapting quicker to life in Canada. She does not have to miss her old friends since they have gotten used to video chatting online during the pandemic. She is even learning to draw from her maternal grandpa in Hong Kong. Naangomai prefers the school life here, with less homework and more engaging teaching methods.

When asked about something memorable before leaving Hong Kong, the trio talked about a trip to Ocean Park. Having met the height requirement, Naangomai was finally able to challenge the Hair Raiser ride. She took the ride 4 times that day. 

On foot, on roller coaster, on plane and on wheels. Now, Naangomai asks in anticipation, “When are we going to Wonderland?” New rides await.

Seeing their child living happily and freely, the journey was probably worth it.